I was looking through Bible Gateway for some things today and I stumbled on this…
The Lord’s Grace to Paul
12 I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service. 13 Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. 14 The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.
This caught me today… because I unlike Paul, do not act in ignorance or unbelief. Everything I do is done with belief and understanding of who God is. The good and the bad. That’s a bit frightening to me. I know better. I am able to change my responses to things, I am able to fight temptation, I am able to guard my heart against all else; but will I; do I?
How I fall. So often. I just throw in the towel and run with whatever is going on. I lose, Tim loses, and the children lose. It isn’t who I want to be. I want to be a woman that can look her grandchildren in the eye and say, “I have been on my knees for you since your momma was 8 years old; believing that the Lord has plans for you, and placing a hedge of protection around you, a spirit of boldness and an everlasting love for your creator and savior.” I can’t say that right now! I fail daily trying to remember just to pray for Tim or the children. We sang yesterday Fire Fall Down and we went into spontaneous worship; it was wonderful, and the words began to seep into my spirit and I realized that the fire has diminished, that the enemy no longer feels fear when I wake up in the morning, and place my foot on the floor. I want the enemy to quake when I wake up. I want him to want me out of this world so badly that he lives in the presence of God asking to take me out. If that isn’t what I am doing to him, I am missing the mark, I am making more ineffective children calling themselves Christians while never knowing the sacrificial life of a martyr for Christ.
I would easily step in front of a bullet for someone else, especially if I didn’t know if they were saved, but would I live for Him everyday, as though every one around me is in jeopardy of a life in eternal fire?
Right now, our society is in a war that most are unaware of. They call the word of God offensive, they determine what we can do, what we can say and they change the standards of what marriage and life and death are. And we allow it. We do not stand. We fear losing our jobs. We fear others arguing with us. We fear being considered aggressive or defensive. We must take a stand. Our children need information at an appropriate level at the appropriate age. My children haven’t realized what being homosexual or gay is. They understand that their grandpa lives in a way that doesn’t honor God. That he chooses to disobey the Lord. I can say he disobeys because he knew the Lord. He made a decision to go back into that lifestyle and married his partner last year. My children don’t see them, because they choose to not be a part of our lives. It’s heartbreaking and so very sad, but it’s so important that they learn that no matter what the culture dictates we are responsible for hearing, reading and obeying the word of God and living a life that honors Him. Are we perfect? Nope. Do I teach my children that we should or could be perfect, no I don’t. I tell them what the word tells them. In this life, there will be trouble. There will be trials, and tribulations, storms and conflict… but there is grace, mercy, love and the One who has overcome the world is able to do abundantly beyond what they can ask or imagine when He gives you the strength.
There is a war. Do not be deceived. You have a role to play, but will you take up your sword and shield, or will you choose to watch from the sidelines?